


I Did Not Have Sexual Relations With That Man

by TheAnnoyingAlien



Series: Political Crack AU [1]
Category: Political RPF - US 20th c., Political RPF - US 21st c.
Genre: Crack, Crack Treated Seriously, Domestic, Everyone Is Gay, Gay, I'm Going to Hell, I'm Sorry, M/M, Mpreg, Multi, Polyamory, Same-Sex Marriage
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-14
Updated: 2016-02-14
Packaged: 2018-05-20 16:30:06
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 11,156
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6016558
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheAnnoyingAlien/pseuds/TheAnnoyingAlien
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A shitty crack fic inspired by the SpongeBob Squarepants episode “Rock-a-Bye Bivalve". After accidentally being impregnated by his married lover, President George W. Bush gives birth to a son and must now balance fatherhood with his presidential duties. His lover, now divorced from his husband and dating George, pledges to always be by the president’s side and to always love and support him and their child, but that promise quickly begins to break. Will George end up like his lover’s ex, or will a better future await him?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is my Valentine’s Day gift to everyone: a shitty long ass crack fanfiction about presidents. This is set in some weird crack AU where Clinton, Bush, and Gore are gay, same sex marriage is legal in the 90s and early 2000s, and cis men can get pregnant somehow. Anyways, I hope you all enjoy this terrible fanfiction, and have a happy Valentine’s Day.

It was mid-February of 2001, and the newly-inaugurated president, George W. Bush, had just retired to his bedroom for the evening after enjoying a warm bath. He slipped into a comfortable, loose-fitting bathrobe and paused to examine himself in the mirror, something that he had taken to doing every night for the past few months. The president’s brow furrowed, and he grimaced.

“My God! I look like a damn cow!” He muttered, disgusted by his own appearance. He turned slightly to view his body from a different angle, hoping that he would find his figure to be more satisfying from this new perspective, but alas, he did not. George sighed and folded his hands atop the swell of his stomach, which had grown quite big with the new life he was carrying. He was nine months pregnant with a baby boy, and he was due to give birth any day now. That day couldn’t come soon enough for him. He was sick of being pregnant; he hated how he looked, he hated how he felt, he hated himself, and so did the American people apparently. 

While his pregnancy had blessed him with a child, it had had a catastrophic effect on his presidential campaign. George had tried to hide it initially, expertly masking his morning sickness and cravings from the prying eyes of the public, but when he inevitably started showing he could no longer keep it a secret. Like Hester Prynne’s scarlet letter, George’s growing stomach told everyone of his sin. Even the dimmest of voters could spot the difference between a baby bump and belly fat, and they were not deceived when he tried to pass it off as mere weight gain from a poor diet. Betrayed by his body, he found himself cornered, and was essentially forced into revealing his shameful secret to the media. George cringed as he thought back to how much of a firestorm that had caused and the hostility with which the country had reacted. 

He had thought that coming clean about his pregnancy would dispel any controversy, but it only paved the way for more. Soon after he revealed that he was with child, the media began pressuring him into revealing the identity of the other father of his baby. The tabloids spread all sorts of filthy rumors about him, claiming that the child was that of his running mate, Dick Cheney, or the product of a one night stand. None of it was true, but the press and political cartoonists had a field day with the falsities, using them to humiliate George and hurt his campaign. Thinking that debunking the lies would take some of the heat off of him, he finally gave in and named the other father at a press conference: the child had been sired by none other than the previous president, Bill Clinton.

Unfortunately for George, instead of remedying the scandal, revealing the child’s father fueled it even more.

George and Bill had already gotten into some hot water for an affair that they had carried out during the late 90s, an affair that they both claimed to have ended after it became public knowledge and after Bill was nearly impeached for lying about it in court. However, as their lovechild clearly showed, that was untrue and they had still been continuing to see each other in secret.

Bill, as he somehow always managed to do, escaped this newest scandal unscathed. At the time, he had been married to his vice president, Al Gore, but Al went ahead and filed for divorce soon after George’s pregnancy became known. Once their divorce was finalized, Bill began an exclusive relationship with George and publically pledged to be there for both him and their unborn child. His taking responsibility for the baby and commitment to George had won him back the nation’s approval, but George was not so fortunate.

The American people despised him, and their sympathy laid entirely with Al, who was running against him in the election. To them, George was nothing but a dirty liar and a homewrecking slut who was so overcome by lust that he wouldn’t think twice about hopping into bed with a married man. Al wasn’t like that at all. Al had always been a doting husband, was honest, and would not stand for Bill sleeping around with the likes of George. He was clearly the better candidate, and all the signs pointed towards him winning the election.

When Election Day finally rolled around that November, George lost the popular vote, just as everyone had expected and wanted. However, thanks to a mishap in Florida and intervention from the third party candidate Ralph Nader, George managed to secure the electoral vote, and that was all that he had needed to win. Al begrudgingly conceded defeat, and the presidency was his.

Now, here he was, the new president, hated by the public and heavily pregnant with the previous president’s lovechild. George knew that he should be glad-he had achieved the nation’s highest office, had a devoted boyfriend by his side, and he was going to be a father-but he still felt miserable.

“How’ll I ever bounce back from this?” He wondered aloud. “How’ll I win over the American people? They’ll never see me as anything more than a hoe and a liar.” Unable to cope with his unhappiness any longer, George broke down and started to sob into his hands. 

“George?” He heard a familiar voice say. Glancing back over his shoulder, he noticed Bill standing in the doorway of their bedroom. George sniffled a bit and dragged his sleeve across his face in a vain attempt to conceal his tears before facing his boyfriend.

“Yeah, Bill?” He replied. Bill frowned and walked over to him, placing his arms around him in a tender hug. 

“Why are you crying, honey?” He asked gently.

“It’s nothing,” George mumbled, leaning his head against Bill’s shoulder. The ex-president wasn’t satisfied with that answer.

“If it were nothing then you wouldn’t be so upset about it.” He reasoned. “Please, George, won’t you tell me what’s wrong? It breaks my heart to see you so upset.” George looked up at Bill and mentally debated whether or not he should tell him of his troubles. He didn’t want his boyfriend to think he was being needy or whiny, but if he refused to share his feelings then Bill would think he was hiding something. The entire country hated and mistrusted him; he didn’t want Bill to do that too. George broke down again and cried into Bill’s blazer. 

“I look and feel like shit and the American people hate me!” He wept. “Look at me, Bill! I look like a damn cow! I’m nothing but a whore! I’ll never be more than that to the country! I’ll never be a great president! I’ll never win a second term!”

“George, baby, none of that is true” Bill assured him, soothingly stroking his back to calm him down, “You’re a very handsome man, and your pregnancy’s only enhanced your looks. You are not a whore, you are not a terrible person, and I know that you’ll be a great president. Regardless of whether or not you win a second term, regardless of what happens in the future, I will always love you, and I will always be there to support you and our son.” He reached down and placed his hand protectively atop George’s stomach, grinning when he felt the baby kicking in response to his touch. George placed his own hand atop Bill’s, and, feeling comforted by his boyfriend’s words, the president smiled. 

“Oh, Bill, you always make me feel good again when I’m down.” He mused. 

“If you come to bed with me I can make you feel even better.” Bill drawled seductively. 

“Oh, I’d like that.” George smirked. He took Bill by the hand and led him over to their bed. He untied his robe and shrugged it off his shoulders, letting it pool around his feet while Bill stripped out of his suit. Now there was nothing separating them, and president and ex-president were free to become one. They made love on the bed, and oh how wonderful it was! George melted under his boyfriend’s touch, enjoying every passionate minute that they spent together. He felt special, loved, wanted, appreciated. The country didn’t love him, but he was content in knowing that at least Bill did, and he always would. When they had finally finished up, they laid back amongst the pillows together, spooning. George laid on his side, the only comfortable position he could manage this late into his pregnancy, and Bill laid behind him, resting his chin upon the president’s shoulder as his arms found their way around his waist. 

As they laid together, enjoying the quiet of the night and the closeness of their embrace, Bill reached down to stroke his boyfriend’s swollen stomach. He found it amazing that there was a child in there, a little person whom he had helped to create.

“I can’t believe I’m gonna be a daddy,” He murmured softly, “Al and I never had any children when we were married.” George grimaced at Bill’s mention of his ex. He absolutely detested Al, and he hated it when his boyfriend talked about him. 

“Well, now you’re with me,” He said, quickly changing the subject, “And we’re going to have our son. Our little George Herbert Walker Clinton.”

“Yeah, little Bert,” Bill mused, “Your dad was so happy when we told him we were naming our son after him.”

“I know. I was surprised that he and Mom took this so well,” George replied, “They’re very excited about becoming grandparents.” Suddenly, he felt a pain in his lower stomach, a sharp, tightening, crushing pain, and he tensed up. 

“You alright?” Bill asked.

“Y-yeah,” George assured him, “I’m okay.” He felt the tightening ease, and he relaxed, thinking that it was just a practice contraction. However, a few minutes later he felt it again, and it was much worse this time. He gritted his teeth to keep from crying out and clutched his stomach, wanting it to end. Bill was growing worried now.

“Are you sure you’re okay?” He pressed. “It’s not time yet, is it?”

“No, no, the baby’s not coming now,” George waved him off. “I think I’m just getting practice contractions. I’ll be right back; I’m going to the bathroom.” He got out of bed and went into the bathroom, but then he felt the tightening once more, excruciatingly painful this time, and doubled over the sink. He heard what sounded like a soft popping noise, and he felt a trickle of something wet running down the backs of his thighs. Realizing what had happened, he panicked and screamed for Bill. Not two seconds later, Bill ran in, still fully unclothed.

“What’s wrong?!” He asked frantically.

“I think my water broke!” George told him. 

“Shit, shit, shit!” Bill swore. “Come on! Let’s get dressed; we need to take you to the hospital!” He ran back into the bedroom, returned a few moments later fully dressed and with some clothes for George, and after helping George dress they left the White House with some Secret Service agents trailing close behind. 

Once they reached the hospital, George’s labor progressed without much issue. The doctors had given him an epidural so he wasn’t in pain, but he still didn’t enjoy the experience very much. He hated being in such a compromising position and having all of these people poking around between his legs. At least he had Bill by his side to comfort him. Eventually, after much pushing, the baby was out. The doctors let Bill cut the umbilical cord and then one of them handed the child to George.

“Congratulations, President Bush,” She said to the president, placing the baby gently in his arms, “You and President Clinton have a beautiful baby boy.” George thanked her and then focused his attention on his son. The doctors had swaddled him in one of those Kuddle-Up baby blankets, the white ones with thick blue stripes and thinner pink stripes, and only his face was visible. He cried softly, and George held him close to his chest, feeling tears of joy starting to well up in his eyes. Bill leaned in and kissed him.

“You did great, George.” He praised his boyfriend. “How do you feel?”

“Sore, but happy,” George replied. “I can’t believe it. We’re fathers. Isn’t this amazing?” 

“Yeah, it sure is,” Bill agreed. “Can I hold him?” George nodded and handed Bert to him. Bill tucked one of his hands under his son’s body and used the other to support his head, holding him very carefully as if he were a delicate porcelain doll. He smiled, admiring the precious little life that his and George’s union had created. George couldn’t help but smile too. As he watched his boyfriend hold their child, he felt himself beaming with an immense sense of pride. He had given Bill a son, something that Al had never given him. He was the president, something that Al would never be. He was the one whom Bill was with, not Al, and he was so happy he could hardly describe it. 

Maybe they would get married soon. George was too nervous to ask about that, especially since Bill’s divorce from Al was still so recent, but he had a feeling that he would eventually become his second husband.

All of that could wait, though. One day they would live in wedded bliss as president and First Man, but for now, George was content. He had his beautiful son, his wonderful boyfriend, and the presidency, and that was all that he needed.


	2. Chapter 2

It had been a couple of days since George had given birth, and he was finally allowed to leave the hospital. He and Bill went shopping for some baby supplies and then stopped by McDonald’s for breakfast before finally returning to the White House with their son. They entered the East Bedroom, which they had converted into a nursery for Bert, and placed him in his crib. The two of them then cuddled up together nearby on the sofa with their food, but Bert began crying, interrupting their meal. 

“Bill, I think he’s hungry.” George surmised. It had been a while since they had last fed him.

“Well, he can’t have my Egg McMuffin,” Bill pointed out, taking a bite of his breakfast sandwich.

“You bought some more formula while we were out, right?” George asked. “Go fix a bottle and I’ll feed him.” Bill nodded and headed off to the kitchen to mix up the formula while George quickly finished his food and got Bert out of his crib. Bill returned a few minutes later with a warm bottle and handed it to him. George gave him a kiss on the cheek to thank him and sat down on the sofa with Bert, shifting positions so that he was cradling the baby with his head propped up slightly. He offered the bottle to him, and Bert latched onto the tip, suckling hungrily. Once he seemed like he’d had his fill, George brought the bottle away from his mouth and set it aside on the coffee table.

“Well, he should be fine for a while.” Bill said. Just then, Bert began crying again. “Why’s he crying now?”

“I don’t know.” Said George. He tried to calm his son down by rocking him and making silly faces, but that didn’t seem to do much. “Don’t cry, Bert! Daddy George is here!” 

“Let me see him, George.” Bill requested. “I think I know what the problem is.” George handed him their son, and he brought him over to the changing table to change him. When he was done, he handed him back to George. Bert smiled at him and cooed; he smiled back and then looked to Bill.

“I’m so glad that you’re here to help me raise our baby,” He sighed lovingly. “I was so worried that you’d want nothing to do with me after I told you I was pregnant.”

“I wouldn’t leave you hanging, honey,” Bill assured him, hooking one of his arms around his waist and pulling him close, “I love you, and I love our son.” George blushed. He felt so special being told that. Being careful not to smother their son in between them, he leaned in and pressed his lips to Bill’s in a gentle kiss.

“I love you too.”

The next month and a half went by without much issue. Even though he was sore from giving birth, George felt a lot happier now than he had when he was pregnant, and the public’s opinion of him was beginning to turn. Despite having recently had a child, he still managed to keep up with his normal routine, as did Bill. George’s parents would usually watch over Bert while the two of them were busy during the day, and during the evening the couple would return to spend some quality time with their son.

Some evenings they would take him out for walks around D.C. in his stroller, other nights they would take him to play at the park, and once they even took a trip to Pennsylvania and got ice cream at the Penn State University Creamery. They still wouldn’t let Bill mix the flavors there since he was no longer president, but they let George mix them, so George ordered what Bill wanted and gave it to him after they left. Things couldn’t have been better. 

After another charming evening together with their son, George and Bill put Bert to bed in his crib and returned to their bedroom for some time alone with each other. George was no longer feeling sore from the birth, so they were finally able to make love again, something that they had both been looking forward to. When they had finished up, they cuddled together beneath the sheets.

“How are you feeling tonight, honey?” Bill asked.

“I’ve never felt better,” George replied, “I’ve got a wonderful boyfriend, a beautiful baby, and the country’s finally starting to warm up to me.”

“I’m glad,” Bill said, stroking his cheek, “It makes me happy to see you so happy, especially after seeing how awful you felt while you were pregnant.” George smiled and leaned into his touch.

“With you by my side, I’ll always be happy.”

The next morning, George got up early to fix breakfast for him and Bill and make a bottle for Bert. His parents were going to be taking some time off over the next few weeks, which left him and Bill solely responsible for watching over their son. George wasn’t worried about this in the slightest; balancing his presidency and parenthood was going to be a piece of cake, especially since Bill was there to help. A few minutes after he had eaten and fed Bert, Bill strolled into the kitchen. He kissed George good morning and sat down at the table to eat his breakfast, noticing Bert sitting in his highchair nearby.

“Hey, Bert,” He greeted his son, playfully ruffling his hair, “How are you doing today?” After finishing his food, he picked Bert up and bounced him on his knee a bit.

“George?” He asked after a minute or two.

“Yeah, Bill?”

“Bert needs a change.”

“Can you change him for me?” George asked while washing the dishes. “My hands are kind of full.”

“Ah, I wish I could, but I’ve gotta get going.”

“Going? Going where?” Bill adjusted his tie and set his plate down by the sink. 

“I’ve got a lot of work to get done today,” He replied. “I know I’m no longer president, but I still have a lot to take care of.”

“You mean you’re going to leave me here alone with the baby all day?” George cried. He wasn’t expecting that.

“Yeah, but I’ll give you a break tonight.” Bill promised. “Don’t you two stop being adorable!” He exited the kitchen, leaving his boyfriend alone with their baby. George gave a weak chuckle and scooped up his son, holding him to his hip as he put the dishes away.

“Alright, see you tonight…”

Later that evening, Bill returned from his office, looking rather exhausted.

“Phew! What a day!” He exclaimed. George stepped out of his own office with some documents tucked under one arm and Bert nestled in his other.

“Oh great, you’re back!” He said. “Now you can help me with the baby!”

“Aw gee, George, I’d love to, but I’m totally beat from work.” Bill declined. He headed into the living room, sat down, and turned on the TV. A cheesy cartoon was playing, but Bill enjoyed it in spite of the corniness.

“Haha! That guy got hit in the head with a coconut!” He laughed. George stood unnoticed in the doorway, holding Bert to his chest, and frowned.

“Bill, what about my break?” He asked.

“Oh yeah, your break!” Bill remembered. “Uh, tomorrow. I promise.” 

“Okay,” George sighed, “Tomorrow.”

The next day, Bill went off to work, once more leaving George to watch their son while simultaneously taking care of presidential business. That evening, he returned, but again declined to give his boyfriend a break. This continued for almost two weeks, and George was rapidly losing his patience. Eventually, he decided he wasn’t going to take it anymore. Bill was in the living room watching the stupid cartoon with the coconut again when George walked in with Bert, looking none too pleased.

“William Jefferson Clinton,” He said sternly, “We need to talk.”

“Just one more minute,” Bill waved him off.

“Don’t ‘one more minute’ me, Bill!” George snapped. He grabbed the remote and turned off the TV, much to Bill’s annoyance.

“Hey! I’m missing the coconut!” He complained.

“Bill, you haven’t been helping at all with Bert!” George said angrily. “We should be working together to raise our son, but you haven’t been doing your share! I’ve been working so hard to balance both my presidency and fatherhood, I’ve been exhausting myself trying to take care of both the country and our baby, but you haven’t done a damn thing for him!”

“I changed his diaper!” Bill defended.

“Yeah, once!” George scoffed.

“He’s only this big,” Bill pointed out, indicating the small size of their son with his hands, “How many diapers could he possibly use?” 

“A lot of diapers!” George shot back. “You said you would never leave me, Bill! You said you would always be by my side, but you haven’t been living up to your word! For the past two weeks you’ve barely spent any time with our son or with me; all you’ve done is go out to work and then come home and watch TV all evening! Why’re you doing this? Do you not want me anymore? Do you not want our son anymore?” 

“How could you ever think that?” Bill questioned, feeling hurt by his boyfriend’s accusations. “Of course I want you, and of course I want our son!” George didn’t believe him. From the way he had been acting these past couple of weeks, he could tell that Bill was losing interest in him and their baby. Unable to handle this awful reality, the president burst into tears.

“No you don’t!” He sobbed. “You only want me for my body and because I’m the only one who can order mixed ice cream for you at Penn State!” 

“George, look at me.” Bill pleaded, placing his hands upon the president’s shoulders. George refused to look up at him. Bill reached out and tilted his chin up so that their eyes met. “George, I do want you and I do want our son. Please believe me when I tell you that.” George looked into his eyes, seeing only sincerity, and nodded. 

“I believe you.” Bill wrapped his arms around him in a hug, being careful to not squish Bert between them, and pressed a kiss to his forehead.

“I’m sorry for making you feel like this, George,” He apologized. “You’re right; I’ve been shirking my responsibilities as a father and it’s been unfair of me to push them all onto you, especially with all the work you already have to do as president. I’ll make it up to you, honey. I promise.”

The next day after breakfast, Bill got ready to leave for work as George looked on, holding Bert snugly in his arms.

“So, what’s the plan for the day?” He asked.

“No more fooling around. From now on, I’m Super Dad!” Bill declared. “I’ll work straight through lunch so I can get done on time, and you can take the night off, honey.” George smiled. He felt so relieved to finally be getting a break.

“Great, so I’ll see you at six o’ clock?”

“Six o’ clock!” Bill confirmed. He nuzzled noses with Bert, making the baby giggle, gave George a quick kiss, and left for his office.


	3. Chapter 3

George was pissed.

It was midnight now, he was tired, stressed, had been woken up several times by Bert’s crying, and Bill still wasn’t back. As he stood near the bedroom door, waiting for Bill to return, he rocked Bert in his arms, trying vainly to lull him back to sleep. Suddenly, he heard the door creak open. Bill walked in, wearing a lampshade over his head.

“Oh, that was some party!” He laughed. Noticing his boyfriend standing there with their baby, he smiled, happy to see them. “Oh, hey George. Hey Bert.” George’s eyes narrowed, and he tapped his foot.

“What?” Bill asked. 

“Oh, nothing.” George muttered.

“Oh, what a relief!” Bill sighed, removing the lampshade from his head and placing it on George’s, much to the president’s dismay. “For a second there I thought you were mad at me!”

“Do you remember what you said to me this morning?” George prodded, taking the lampshade off of his head.

“Something about root beer, right?” Bill asked. George sighed.

“No.” Bill frowned.

“Oh wait, wait, let me guess!” He thought for a moment, but came up with nothing. “Alright, I give up.”

“Does ‘you can take the night off, honey!’ ring a bell?” George quipped, mockingly imitating his boyfriend. Bill grimaced at him, not in the mood for his sass.

“I don’t need this!” He sneered. He left the bedroom and began heading down the hall. 

“Where do you think you’re going?!” George called out after him.

“I’m going back to work!” Bill yelled back.

“Work!?” George wasn’t going to have any of that. He stopped by Bert’s room to set him down in his crib, threw on his robe, and took off after his boyfriend. Eventually, he reached Bill’s office, and when he entered he was met with a shocking sight. Bill was watching that stupid show with the coconut again and eating ice cream instead of working, but he had expected that much. What he wasn’t expecting was to see one of his political adversaries, none other than Al Gore, his boyfriend’s ex-husband, kneeling between Bill’s legs and giving him a blowjob.

“So! This is work?” George scoffed. Bill, realizing that he’d been caught, shoved Al away from him and tried to think of an excuse. “Uh… it’s not what it looks like!” He lied.

“You’re not working!” George shouted. “You’ve just been sitting on your ass gorging on junk food, watching TV, and fooling around with your ex!”

“I did not have sexual relations with that man, Mr. Gore.” Bill professed, gesturing to Al.

“I just saw him blowing you!” George pointed out. 

“Why are you lying to him, Bill?” Al asked confusedly. “I thought you said he was alright with you seeing me.”

“No I’m not!” George cried. “He told me nothing about this! Bill, how could you do this to me? I thought you loved me!”

“I do!” Bill claimed. “I really do!” George was unconvinced.

“Then why are you messing around with that treehugging hoe?!” He shrieked.

“Hey, don’t get mad at me, you vote thief!” Al shot back. “I wouldn’t have gotten with Bill again if he’d told me that you weren’t alright with it! He lied to me too!”

“Tell us the truth, Bill!” George demanded. “Which one of us do you want to be with? Do you want to be with me, your devoted boyfriend, the other father of your child, or Al Whore over here?”

“Excuse me! I am not a whore!” Al huffed. “Look, I really am sorry, I didn’t mean to hurt you even though you hurt me and stole the vote, but Bill lied to me too! I thought he’d changed, and I was wrong!”

“Al, I have changed!” Bill interrupted. “I swear I have!”

“No you haven’t!” Al said sharply. “I left you because you lied to me, and just when I think you’ve stopped lying, I find out that you’re still continuing to lie not just to me, but to Bush as well! We’re done, Bill! I’m not putting up with this shit anymore!”

“And neither am I!” George added. “You and I are through, Bill! Tomorrow morning, your ass is out of the White House, and I’m never letting you see our son again!” Bill was crushed.

“George, don’t do this to me!” He begged. “Don’t leave me! Don’t take our baby!”

“Don’t tell me what to do!” George yelled. “No one tells the president what to do!”

“George, please, let’s just go to bed and forget about this!” Bill pleaded, trying futilely to calm him down.

“No! You’re not sleeping in my bed tonight; you’re never sleeping in my bed again!” George announced. “I won’t kick you out right now since it’s so late, but you’re sleeping in one of the guest rooms, not with me! Go!” Knowing that nothing he could ever say would change the president’s mind, Bill sulked out of his office and went to go find one of the guest rooms to sleep in. Now that that was taken care of, George had to deal with Al. He glanced back at the former vice president and frowned upon noticing how heartbroken he appeared. It was clear from the look in his eyes that he still loved Bill in spite of his infidelity and lying, a feeling that George shared. He didn’t like Al, but he sympathized with him, and he refused to hold any animosity towards him for something that was not his fault. He watched curiously as the vice president sighed and rose from the floor, shaking his head.

“I’m such an idiot for getting back with him…” He grumbled. “How could I be so stupid?”

“At least you don’t have a kid with him.” George pointed out. “You can spend the night here too, Gore. I know that we don’t really get along well with each other, but I’m not going to stay mad at you for something that Bill did, and I’m not going to boot you out this late.” Al seemed touched by this gesture.

“Thank you, Bush,” He thanked him. “I really am sorry about all of this.”

“It’s fine, don’t worry about it.” George waved him off. “Pick whichever one of the guest rooms you like. I’d better go check on my son.” He was about to leave for Bert’s room, but Al caught him by the wrist, stopping him.

“I’ll come with you.” He offered. “You look like you could use a hand.” George was surprised at his willingness to help, but he wasn’t going to turn him down, especially not after so many nights of having to look after his son alone. 

“Thanks, Gore,” He thanked the vice president, “I really do appreciate it.” He led Al to Bert’s room; Al stood and admired the décor while George went to retrieve his son. Bert was lying in his crib, whimpering and squirming, wanting to be comforted. George scooped him up and rocked him, but that didn’t seem to calm him down.

“There there, buddy,” He whispered, “It’s alright. Daddy’s here.” Al, intrigued by the baby, approached George and peered over his shoulder at him. He smiled, enamored by the president’s son.

“Aww, he’s adorable. Looks a lot like you and Bill, too.” He commented. “His name’s Bert, right?” George nodded, smiling tiredly.

“Yeah, Bert,” He confirmed. “He always wakes up around this time, and rocking him usually calms him down, but for whatever reason I just can’t seem to get him to stop crying tonight.”

“Let me see him.” Al requested. George handed him Bert, and he immediately stopped bawling, fascinated by this new person. “Hello there, Bert.” Al cooed, nuzzling noses with the baby. Bert giggled and placed his hands on Al’s face. George was pleasantly surprised.

“He likes you.” He mused, grinning at the adorable sight. 

“So he does.” Al chuckled. He sat down on the sofa with Bert, rocking him gently in his arms to further soothe him. George sat down next to him, and the two of them struck up a conversation, talking about various little things as they took turns holding and rocking Bert. George really admired how gentle and loving Al was with his son. He felt himself starting to develop a bit of affection towards the man that he had hated for so long, and as much as he wanted to deny it, he couldn’t. He didn’t realize it before, but Al was a very handsome man. On top of that, he seemed to be such a wonderful person, and George was beginning to feel a bit guilty for putting him through what he did.

“Al, I’m sorry for stealing Bill from you and for what happened during the election,” He finally apologized as he passed Bert to Al for his next turn to hold him. “You seem like a nice guy, and I don’t want there to be any bad blood between us anymore.”

“It’s alright, George,” Al assured him, “The election is over with, the vote went to you, and nothing can change that. Neither of us had a fair fight; I got screwed over in the Electoral College by Nader and Florida, and you got screwed over in the popular vote by all that negative publicity from your pregnancy. The media was brutal with you, and you didn’t deserve that.”

“It’s fine,” George replied, “The media made me feel like shit, but Bill was always by my side to cheer me up again. I can’t believe that he would lie to me like this. I thought he really loved me, and I thought he loved our son...”

“I’m sure he does,” Al said, trying to comfort him, “But I think he still has feelings for me too. When I’ve been meeting up with him in his office he’s been telling me that he still loves me even though we’re divorced. I think he loves both of us, and he’s just having a hard time choosing who he wants to be with.”

“Yeah.” George agreed. “I’m very sorry for ruining your marriage to him. I know how much you love him, and even though I love him too, it was wrong of me to sleep with him while he was with you.”

“I wouldn’t have minded all that much if he had just been honest with me,” Al explained, “I’m fine with him sleeping with other men; what I don’t like is the lying.”

“I feel the same way,” Said George, “He probably thinks we would never be open to that sort of thing, though. You know… maybe we were too harsh with him. We should try and talk things out tomorrow.” Al nodded.

“It’s getting late,” He pointed out, “We should put Bert to bed now.” 

“Let me kiss him goodnight first.” George requested. The two of them rose from the sofa and Al held Bert up so that he could be kissed by his father. George leaned in, fully prepared to give him a peck on the cheek, but something made him hesitate. Though his son was right there, he found himself unable to take his attention off of the former vice president holding him. George’s cheeks flushed, and his heart began to race. There was something about Al that he found positively entrancing. Maybe it was his looks, for he was quite an attractive man, or perhaps it was his personality or how loving he was with his son. Whatever the reason, he was drawn to Al, and his blossoming affection for him was starting to morph into something more intense. He wanted to hold Al, to kiss him, to tell him he loved him.

“Oh no,” He thought, “I’m falling for him!” Al raised an eyebrow at the president, puzzled by the color in his cheeks and his reluctance to kiss his son.

“George? Are you alri-” He started to say, but he found himself silenced by George, who had pressed their lips together in an unanticipated kiss. Al was stunned, but he made no effort to protest. George, meanwhile, was in heaven, enjoying the feel of the vice president’s warm lips against his own. He knew that Al had been sucking Bill’s dick earlier, but he didn’t care. He wanted this badly, and nothing would hold him back. After what seemed like forever, he broke the kiss and, noticing the shocked look on Al’s face, he panicked.

“I… I’m sorry!” He stammered, hoping to God that he hadn’t upset him. “I… you… you’re just so… I like you, okay?! I know we’ve hated each other for a long time and we’re only just now starting to get along, but I really do like you, and I-” Al caught him in another kiss, quieting him. George’s eyes widened. Now it was his turn to be shocked.

“I like you too,” Al smirked, pulling away from him, “And I’m glad that you kissed me. It’s nice to know that the feelings are mutual.”

“I can do much more than kiss you, if you’d like,” George drawled suggestively. “Let’s put my son to bed and go to my room.” He kissed Bert goodnight for real this time, Al placed him in his crib, and the two of them left for George’s bedroom.

Once there, they shed their clothes, George laid Al down on his bed, and they made love. The encounter was a little awkward initially, since they had not been intimate with each other before and neither man was sure what the other liked, but they had a lot of fun figuring it out. Afterwards, the two of them cuddled beneath the covers, Al resting his head upon George’s chest as the latter drew his arm around his shoulders.

“Was it good for you?” He asked, hoping that he had pleased his new lover.

“Oh, yes,” Al replied, “Was it good for you too?” George grinned and kissed him.

“Of course, Al Gorgeous.” Al cracked a smile, amused by the nickname.

“I like that a lot better than Al Whore.” He laughed. “Hey, George… I’ve been thinking about something.”

“What?”

“Do you love me?”

“Of course I love you,” George affirmed. “Why?”

“I love you too, we both love Bill, and Bill loves both of us. What if we all started dating each other?” Al suggested.

“All three of us together? At the same time?” George asked, wanting some clarification. Al nodded. “Well, I’d like that. But we’ll have to ask Bill.”

“We can do that tomorrow.” Al decided. “Right now, let’s spend a little more time with each other.” He pulled George on top of him, and their bodies connected a second time.

The next morning, George and Al got out of bed and went to Bert’s room. Bert cooed happily as Al scooped him out of his crib and carried him to the sofa. George stepped out for a minute to fix a bottle, then he returned and gave it to Al so he could feed his son.

“You’re really good with Bert, Al,” He noted, still so impressed with how naturally caring for children seemed to be for the vice president. “How come you and Bill never had any kids?”

“Well, it wasn’t like we never tried,” Al sighed wistfully, “We did, and very frequently too, but for whatever reason it just didn’t happen. Bill obviously isn’t infertile since the two of you have Bert, so I guess I am. It’s a shame; I would have loved to have had a kid or two, but apparently I can’t, and I’ve just had to accept that.”

“Oh…” George felt kind of bad for bringing that up now, and he wasn’t sure where to take the conversation next. Just then, he heard the door open. He and Al both glanced up, only to see Bill standing there in the doorway. The former president seemed uneasy under the gaze of his two ex-lovers. He cleared his throat nervously and folded his hands behind his back.

“George, Al,” He addressed them, “Can we talk?” The president and vice president nodded.

“Come sit with us.” George offered, patting the empty spot between him and Al on the sofa. Bill obliged and joined them.

“What did you want to talk about?” Al asked, setting Bert’s bottle aside.

“I… I just wanted to say that I’m sorry for lying to both of you.” Bill apologized. “I didn’t mean to hurt either of you, and I’m sorry that I did. Al, you were my first love and my husband, and though I cheated on you with George, I really did and I still do love you. I’m sorry that I lied about George being alright with us carrying out a relationship on the side. That was wrong of me to trick you like that.” 

“I forgive you.” Said Al.

“And George,” Bill continued, “I met you after Al and I were married, but my feelings for you were and are just as strong as my feelings for him. I love you and our son, and I’m sorry for lying to you about being with Al and for neglecting my responsibilities as a father.”

“I forgive you too.” Said George. “Are you going to get back with one of us?”

“I… I don’t know,” Bill sighed, “I really do love and care for both of you, and no matter which one of you I’m with nothing will change that. I don’t want to put either of you through any more heartbreak by choosing between you.”

“What if you didn’t have to choose?” Al asked.

“What if you could have both of us?” George added.

“What?” Bill exclaimed, not expecting them to say that. “All three of us dating?”

“Yep,” Al confirmed, “All three of us can be together, if you’d like.”

“Well, I’d be down for that,” Bill replied, “But how would that work? You and George hate each other!” Al and George turned to one another, grinned, and leaned in for a kiss, much to Bill’s surprise.

“It’s true, we did hate each other,” George said as they parted lips, “But last night, we managed to make amends.”

“And make love, too.” Al smirked. 

“Oh, my,” Bill laughed, grinning a lecherous grin, “I would have loved to have been a part of that.”

“You can be,” George chuckled, “Al, go put Bert down for his morning nap. Then we can go spend some quality time together.” Al placed Bert in his crib, and the three of them returned to George’s bedroom. George leaned in and kissed Bill on one of his cheeks while Al kissed him on the other, they undressed, and they became one.

When they were done, George fell back against the pillows with his two boyfriends and smiled. Not only did he have the presidency, a boyfriend, and a son, he now had a second boyfriend as well. This was more than he ever could have asked for; this was the start of something beautiful.


	4. Chapter 4

It had been about four years since Bill, George, and Al had entered into a relationship, and everything was going well for them. They had all gotten married to each other after a year of being together, and things had only continued to improve. George had just won himself another term in office, easily beating out the ticket of John Kerry and his boyfriend John Edwards, they had celebrated their third wedding anniversary, and Bert had had his fourth birthday party. He had grown into a beautiful child, with a full head of wavy brown hair and bright baby-blue eyes. He looked so much like Bill and George, with little bits and pieces of their personalities as well, and as the first baby in the White House since the Kennedy presidency, he had quickly become the darling of the American people. 

As much as the public adored him, no one could ever love him more than his three fathers. They doted upon him, always making time for him in spite of their busy schedules. They each shared the responsibility of parenting equally, occasionally asking George’s parents to fill in when all three of them were occupied, and currently, it was Al’s turn to watch over him.

George and Bill were off together on a diplomatic visit to the United Kingdom, leaving him alone with their son for a few days. He was feeling a bit under the weather, but he wouldn’t let that keep him from taking care of Bert. After they had eaten lunch, Al laid down on the sofa in Bert’s bedroom and watched while his son played with some of his stuffed animals, paper, and crayons.

“Daddy Al!” He called out, getting his father’s attention. “A whale’s in trouble!” He pointed to one of his stuffed whale toys. He had placed it on its side atop a pile of papers scribbled on in yellow crayon to mimic sand. Nearby, there were some more papers with lots of blue wavy lines drawn onto them, presumably meant to be the ocean. Al smiled and got off the couch, kneeling down to join his son.

“Fear not, fair whale!” He exclaimed heroically, “I’ve come to save you!” He nudged the whale back into the “ocean”, earning delighted giggles from Bert. Al couldn’t help but giggle as well; it made him feel so special knowing that something as small as this brought his child such joy. Suddenly, he felt sick to his stomach and hunched over, clamping one of his hands over his mouth. 

“Are you okay, Daddy Al?” Bert asked worriedly. Al didn’t have a chance to reply; he hurried off to the bathroom and puked in the toilet. Afterwards, he got up and turned to see Bert standing in the doorway, staring up at him with tears in his eyes.

“What’s wrong, Bert?” He asked gently, reaching down to stroke his son’s hair.

“Why’re you sick, Daddy?” Bert whimpered. “Are you gonna get better soon?”

“Of course I am, buddy,” Al assured him, “Everyone gets sick every now and then, and it’s perfectly fine.”

“Okay, Daddy.” Bert sniffled.

“Why don’t you go back to your room and find some more whales for me to save?” Al suggested. “I’ll join you in a minute.” Bert nodded and ran off to collect all his toy whales. Once he was gone, Al breathed an uneasy sigh and examined himself in the mirror. He lifted his shirt a bit, eyeing his bare stomach, and wondered if he could possibly be pregnant. He had always thought that he had been infertile-his initial marriage to Bill had not resulted in any children, and he didn’t think his new marriage to both Bill and George would produce any either-but perhaps he had been wrong.

“I wonder…” Wanting to see if his suspicions were true, he opened one of the drawers and pulled out a pregnancy tester. After reading the instructions, he used it and waited a few minutes for the results to come up. Finally, when he had let it sit for the appropriate amount of time, he checked it. He was shocked but elated by what he saw. Two lines; that meant that he was pregnant! Al was so happy, a small smile graced his face and he placed his hand atop his stomach. After going so long thinking he could never bear children, he was finally going to have a baby. But which one of his husbands was the other father?

“Shit, is it Bill’s or George’s?” He muttered to himself. Since he was married to both of them, he’d naturally been sleeping with both of them, and either one of them could have sired the child. They had talked about possibly having more children in the future, and all three of them were open to it, but Al worried that his having a child fathered by one of his husbands and not the other would cause some tension in their marriage. Whenever they had discussed having children, they always talked about George carrying children fathered by Bill, since Al had thought himself to be infertile and Bill had no interest in becoming pregnant. 

Al loved and cared for Bert as if he were his own biological child, but what would Bill or George think of raising a baby that they had not fathered? Al tried not to worry about that at the moment; he tossed the pregnancy tester in the trash and returned to Bert’s bedroom to continue playing with him. This was something that would be better discussed in person as opposed to over the phone; he would tell Bill and George when they returned. Until then, he was going to relax and enjoy some time with his son.

After a couple more days passed, Bill and George finally returned from their trip to the United Kingdom. They got back late in the evening, greeting a nervous Al and a very sleepy Bert with the usual hugs and kisses. It was well past Bert’s bedtime, but he had insisted upon seeing his fathers before he went to sleep, so Al had let him stay up. The three tucked him in immediately after their reunion and then headed back to their bedroom for the night. Al sat quietly on the edge of the bed and watched as Bill and George finished unpacking their things. He had been trying all day to muster up the courage to tell them about the baby, but he still wasn’t sure if he could do it.

“How was Bert while we were gone, Al?” George asked as he and Bill put away the last of their luggage. “I hope he didn’t give you too much trouble.”

“Oh no, he was an angel,” Al assured him, “He always is.”

“It’s so good to be back,” Bill sighed, “We missed spending time with you and Bert, Al. And we missed doing some other things with you too…” He joined Al on the bed and placed his arms around his waist, pulling him into a kiss. 

“Hey, don’t start without me!” George cried. He plopped down next to his husbands and started to unbutton Al’s blazer as he trailed a line of kisses down his neck. Al tried his best to forget about his troubles and enjoy the intimacy, but he just couldn’t. He was too worried about how his husbands would react to his being pregnant. 

“W-wait,” He mumbled anxiously, pulling away from them, “Before we go any further… Bill, George, I have something I really need to tell you.”

“You’re not leaving us, are you?” George asked, looking hurt.

“No, I would never leave either of you,” Al replied, “It’s just… well, I haven’t been feeling well this week, and a few days ago I found out that I was pregnant.” His husbands both seemed delighted by this news.

“Oh, Al!” Bill exclaimed, placing his hand on Al’s belly, “This is wonderful! You’re finally gonna have a baby, just like you’ve always wanted!”

“We’re going to have another kid! Bert’s getting a little brother or sister!” George squealed excitedly. “We’d better start thinking of names!” 

“I’m glad that you’re both as happy about the baby as I am, but I’m not sure which one of you is the other father.” Al told them. “I’ve been sleeping with both of you-and very often, too-so I couldn’t possibly tell.”

“That doesn’t matter to either of us,” Said George, “Regardless of which one of us fathered them, this is still our baby, and we’ll love them all the same.” He reached down to rub Al’s belly, and Al smiled. He felt relieved to hear that; now there was nothing for him to worry about.

“Can we have sex now?” Asked Bill.

“Oh, Bill,” Al scolded him playfully, “Is that all you ever think about?”

“It’s not all that I think about,” Bill smirked, “Just most of what I think about.” Al couldn’t help but laugh.

“Come here, you two.” He pulled George and Bill on top of him, their clothes were tossed aside, and they made love all night long.

The next morning, the three of them got up and headed into the kitchen to fix themselves some breakfast. Bill had eggs and bacon, George had waffles, and Al, who was already starting to get some pretty odd cravings, had mint ice cream mixed with pretzels.

“Have you told Bert about the baby yet?” Bill inquired. Al shook his head before stuffing a spoonful of his ice cream into his mouth.

“No,” He admitted, “I wanted to tell you two first so we could all tell him together.” Just then, Bert walked into the kitchen, yawning and rubbing his eyes.

“Morning, Daddies.” He greeted them.

“Oh, good morning Bert!” George greeted him back. “Guess what? Daddy Bill, Daddy Al, and I have some wonderful news to share with you.” Bert was intrigued; he tilted his head to the side, wondering what his fathers could possibly want to tell him.

“What is it, Daddy George?” He asked curiously.

“We’re having a baby,” George revealed, “You’re going to be a big brother!” Bert seemed happy about that.

“Where’s the baby?” He questioned. “When’s it gonna be here?”

“The baby’s in Daddy Al’s tummy right now,” Bill explained, resting his hand on Al’s stomach as George did the same, “It’ll come out in about nine months.” Bert reached up and placed his own small hand atop his fathers’ larger ones, eyes wide with amazement. 

“How’d it get in there, and how’ll it come out?” He wondered aloud. George looked mortified, Al blushed, and Bill started laughing until he was red in the face.

“We’ll tell you when you’re older.” He smirked.


	5. Chapter 5

It had been about eight months since Al had first announced his pregnancy. He had found out after his first ultrasound that he was pregnant with twins, which was an unexpected but welcome surprise. He had decided that he wanted to keep their genders a secret until the birth, and he still wasn’t sure whether or not Bill or George had fathered them, but he didn’t care. He was going to have two more wonderful children with his wonderful husbands, and he was happy.

He had put on some weight and had gotten quite round over the course of his pregnancy, but he didn’t feel self-conscious at all, not when he had both Bill and George always telling him how handsome he looked. The media had been covering his pregnancy (in a much more tasteful and respectful manner than it had covered George’s, much to everyone’s relief), the entire country was looking forward to the arrival of the First Family’s new additions, and Bert was looking forward to becoming a big brother. Al sat with him on the sofa that afternoon, watching as his son placed his stuffed whales upon his stomach.

“Your tummy’s round like the Earth!” Bert giggled. Al smiled. He took Bert’s hand and guided it to his belly. 

“The babies are kicking.” He told him. “Can you feel them?” Bert nodded.

“When will they come out, Daddy?” He asked. “I want to meet them!”

“Soon, sweetheart,” Al replied. “Just be patient.” 

“Can we go for a walk now, Daddy Al?” Bert pleaded. “I wanna play in the snow!”

“Alright,” Al agreed, “First let’s go see if your other fathers want to come too.” He got off of the sofa with some minor difficulty due to his heavily pregnant state, and he and Bert went to go find Bill and George. The two of them were working in their offices, but they decided to take a break to spend time with their husband and son. The four of them bundled up in warm clothing since it was rather cold out and snowing and set off for a walk around D.C., flanked by a few Secret Service agents as was customary. Bill, George, and Al walked together in a line, with Al in the middle and Bill and George on either side of him. Bill and George each had an arm draped over his shoulders, and Al rested his hands upon his stomach as they strolled along. Bert was walking a few feet ahead of them, conversing with some of the agents. While they usually maintained their serious dispositions, not even the sternest of the agents could help but break into a grin when speaking with the president’s son.

After walking for a while, they decided to stop and rest for a bit near the Washington Monument. A few other families were there having fun in the snow, and Bert wanted to join in. He laid down and made a snow angel as his fathers and the agents looked on.

“I’m glad Bert’s having a good time.” Said Al. Bill and George nodded in agreement.

“Are you feeling alright, Al?” Bill asked. “The walk’s not too tiring for you, is it?”

“Nah, I’m feeling fine.” He assured him.

“You’re not too cold, are you?” George questioned. Al shook his head.

“Nope, I’m nice and warm.” He replied. He felt a slight pressure against his hands, and he grinned. “The babies are kicking. Come feel.” George and Bill did so happily, placing their gloved hands softly atop their husband’s stomach. They both smiled, feeling the children within him squirm under their touch.

“Daddy George!” They heard Bert call out, interrupting the sweet moment. George glanced over his shoulder, only to see that his son had a snowball in his hand. He threw it his way, but he quickly ducked and dodged it. Bert threw another, but George dodged it again.

“Missed me!” He laughed. Al grinned. 

“I want you on my dodgeball team.” He joked. George turned and flashed him a cocky smile, but unfortunately for him Bert took the opportunity to hurl another snowball at him while he was distracted, and this time it hit him square in the face, knocking him down. Bill and Al tried to hold back their laughter as some of the Secret Service agents rushed to help the president up. Al suddenly felt a sharp pain in his lower abdomen; he winced, and his hands flew to his stomach.

“Is everything alright, Mr. Gore?” One of the other agents asked him.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” He said, waving her off, “Just laughed a little too hard, I think.” He felt the pain subside, and he went to rejoin his husbands and son. Bert was worried that he’d hurt George, but George assured him that he was fine, and that seemed to calm him down. After playing in the snow for a little while longer, they all continued on with their walk. Al was beginning to feel a bit uncomfortable now; the pain in his abdomen had come back and had only intensified. Eventually it got to the point where it was so bad he could no longer walk; he dropped to his knees and clutched his stomach again, crippled by the discomfort.

“AL!” Bill and George cried in unison, immediately running to him. The Secret Service agents flocked to him as well, wanting to make sure that no harm had come his way. Bert started crying, and one of the agents stayed back to comfort him while Bill, George, and the other agents helped Al get to his feet again.

“Al, are you alright?” Bill asked him worriedly. “What’s wrong?”

“I think the babies are coming!” Al cried, realizing what was happening.

“But you haven’t gone the full nine months yet!” George pointed out. “You still have a few weeks left before you should be going into labor!”

“He’s carrying twins, though,” An agent reminded him, “Twins tend to be born earlier than single babies.”

“We need to get you to the hospital, Mr. Gore,” Another agent declared, “And quickly!” The agents all swarmed around Al, pushing Bill, George, and Bert aside as they picked him up and began carrying him off.

“Hey!” George exclaimed, hurrying after them, “Wait for us!” Bill scooped up Bert and followed close behind.

“Daddy Bill,” Bert whimpered, “What’s going on? Is Daddy Al gonna be okay?” 

“He’s gonna be just fine, buddy,” Bill said gently, not wanting to further upset his son, “But it looks like our walk’s gonna be cut short!” 

Eventually, after much rushing around with the Secret Service agents, they finally ended up at the hospital and had Al admitted. Most of the agents stayed in the waiting room with Bert while a few of them followed Bill, George, and Al up to the delivery room. The agents kept guard outside while Bill and George stayed with Al for most of his labor, but when it came time for him to start pushing, he found that he was unable to push the babies out. The doctors then determined that he would need a C-section, and they shooed Bill and George out of the room so they could perform it. The two presidents sat in the waiting room with Bert and the rest of their agents until they were finally allowed back inside.

“Congratulations, President Bush and President Clinton,” One of the doctors said as they entered, “You and Vice President Gore have two beautiful, healthy babies.” They both thanked the doctor and approached their husband. Al was doing fairly well; he looked tired and a bit disheveled but was otherwise fine. He had the babies nestled in his arms, both swaddled up in matching blankets and crying softly. Bill and George leaned in to kiss him and praise him for a job well done.

“I’m never going through this again,” The vice president sighed weakly, “Once I heal up from the C-section, we’re all getting vasectomies.” Bill cringed at this.

“I don’t want anyone cutting into my nuts!” He cried, cupping his crotch protectively.

“You don’t know what it’s like to be pregnant or give birth, Bill,” George pointed out, “Both Al and I have gone through it, but you’ve never had to carry any of our kids!”

“And I’m never going to,” Bill huffed, “I don’t want to get pregnant, and we’ve got three kids already! Speaking of our kids, are the babies boys or girls?”

“They’re both girls,” Said Al. “Come look at them; they’re so precious.” Bill scooped up one of the little girls while George scooped up the other. They were both very small, no doubt from being born early, but they appeared healthy just as the doctor had said, and their fathers were all thankful for that. Bill carefully pulled the blanket away from his daughter’s face, and he was pleasantly surprised by what he saw.

“Aw, gee,” He chuckled, “She looks like me. I guess I’m the other dad, then.” 

“But that can’t be!” George cried. “She looks like me!” He held up their other daughter, who looked strikingly similar to him.

“Oh, I noticed that too,” Al interrupted, “I asked one of the doctors about that, and she told me that fraternal twins can sometimes have different fathers. Bill, you must have fathered one of our daughters, and George, you fathered the other.”

“Well, who they get their genes from really doesn’t matter anyways,” Said Bill, “We love both of them just the same. And we love you too, Al.”

“What are we going to name them?” George asked, gesturing to the twins.

“I was thinking Alberta Wilma Clinton and Georgia Arnalda Clinton.” Al suggested. “We can call them Allie and Gia for short.” They had all previously agreed that no matter who the biological father was, they would give the children Bill’s last name, but Al hoped that his husbands would like the first and middle names he had picked out. They did, so the birth certificates were signed and the babies were christened Allie and Gia. The three of them then decided that it was time for Bert to meet his little sisters. Bill and George handed the girls back to Al and retrieved their son from the waiting room. Bill held him up over the bed so he could get a good view of his sisters.

“Bert, these are your sisters, Allie and Gia.” He introduced them.

“They’re really little!” Bert giggled, amused by the two tiny babies before him. His fathers smiled, glad that he seemed to like the twins.

“You were that little once,” George told him, “They’ll get bigger as they get older, just like you did.”

“Are they coming home with us now, Daddy George?” Bert asked.

“Not yet, buddy,” George replied, “They and Daddy Al need to stay here for a few days so the doctors can make sure they’re okay.” 

“But I want them to come home with us!” Bert whined. 

“Don’t worry, Bert,” Al said, reaching down to ruffle his hair, “We’ll be home before you know it.”

The next few days passed by quickly, and Al and the twins were finally allowed to leave the hospital. Bert was glad to have him and his new sisters back home, as were Bill and George. They sat out on the Truman Balcony together, enjoying some hot chocolate as they watched the snow fall. Bill and Al each held one of the twins, while George held Bert. The six of them just sat there, enjoying each other’s company and admiring the view of the snow-covered south lawn. Well, Bill, Al, and Bert were admiring the view. George was admiring his family.

He couldn’t have been happier with how things had turned out for him. He had gone from being the scorned lover of a president to becoming a president himself, a distinguished, popular president who had had the privilege of being elected to a second term. He was the proud father of not one, but three beautiful children, and married to not one, but two handsome First Men. 

George smiled. He had won the presidency, and so much more.


End file.
